Saturday afternoon sunbeams splash through the windows creating a mosaic of shadows on the walls and floor, warming the room and inviting me to sit a spell. It is almost magical and it frightens me because relaxing is akin to waving the white flag of surrender. Relaxing is the slippery hill that leads to hell. Relaxing requires that I ignore the puritan work ethic so deeply engrained in my bones and psyche and renounce at least temporarily the unproven link between my ability to work hard and my salvation. The sunbeams casting puddles of warmth are just another form of temptation; they are sirens luring me toward the damning pit of laziness.
The Nap
God is very patient with me and with my hyperboles. When I take a minute to think about this relaxing phenomena, I realize that God started over thirty years ago in earnest trying to help me get it. I confess to being a slow learner on some counts. I married a man who has napping in his DNA, that was God's first attempt at exposing me to a new paradigm on relaxation. Then we had kids. They heard dad offer up the word 'relaxing' as an explanation for his catnaps on the couch back in the day when I couldn't walk past the napping man without having a meltdown.
Over time, liking the idea led to researching the subject, scheduling time into my day to read and meditate, and otherwise adding additional activities about relaxing instead of actually figuring out what relaxing was about. One can get oneself into a pickle when you miss the obvious. But God doesn't give up. And so, Kanti came into our lives.
The Nap
There on the couch lies my husband without regard for his salvation, blissfully snoozing in the sun. I have a momentary twinge of angst. You know the one. It has an edge of self-pity and martyrdom, and wonders why I am the only person in this house doing all the work. Yes, I acknowledge that hyperbole laces that analysis. These days the hyperbole is becoming a quieter voice that is only heard inside my head.
God is very patient with me and with my hyperboles. When I take a minute to think about this relaxing phenomena, I realize that God started over thirty years ago in earnest trying to help me get it. I confess to being a slow learner on some counts. I married a man who has napping in his DNA, that was God's first attempt at exposing me to a new paradigm on relaxation. Then we had kids. They heard dad offer up the word 'relaxing' as an explanation for his catnaps on the couch back in the day when I couldn't walk past the napping man without having a meltdown.
Just 'laxing
One day the house was very quiet which isn't a good thing when you have toddlers on the premise but not in sight. I thought I should investigate the quietness, and called out asking what they were doing. The response was "Just 'laxing." And so, the phrase became part of our family lexicon. Alas, I still was not willing to actually relax but I did become quite fond of the idea of 'laxing.Over time, liking the idea led to researching the subject, scheduling time into my day to read and meditate, and otherwise adding additional activities about relaxing instead of actually figuring out what relaxing was about. One can get oneself into a pickle when you miss the obvious. But God doesn't give up. And so, Kanti came into our lives.
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